I throw a question out to you,
Friends vs friends.Com? Which one trumps in your warring life?
I know that question puzzles you, and it very well should. What i intend to ask you there is does the number of your true, real friends outnumber your ‘dot com’ friends, your online friends?
I won’t take yes for an answer because nobody on earth has ever proved it to me. So be my guest, prove it for me!
We all have a thousand friends on Facebook, instagram, snap chat, we chat, hike chat, this chat, that chat, etc chat. Oh and, I’d be terribly disparaging the list, if I obliviate Whatsapp!
I mean congratulations to all those who’ve entered the 4 digit club of friends. Groundbreaking, outstanding, laudable, commendable, amazing! But, introducing the inevitable but, how many of them are for real? Friends who you can count on? Those, you have no inhibitions with? Talking, sharing, opening up are no different terms. Whom you are never busy for?
Answer me if you can. Surprise me if that’s more than a tenth of your online friends. There lies the entire issue.
All of us are so much into the digital world that when you run into your Whatsapp friend out of the blue, all you can talk about is “hey, sup, ok thanks, ttyl”. It’s all a bubble. A big big bubble. And you know how bubbles are. They are meant to burst. And, some day they do burst, only to accompany you with bursting tears.
Because the fact is, they are just your ” chat friends ” and nothing more. They provide you virtual happiness, virtual friendship, virtual humor, virtual regalement, and that’s where it also ends. You can’t count on them. They aren’t friends. They are just on screen. Not off screen. They are deceiving your conscious mind innumerably and you’re inured to it.
Nothing to hide, I’ll speak up for myself.
Even I’ve been a victim of this. This whole idea of virtual satisfaction dawned upon me while i was in fyjc. I had a thousand friends on Facebook but yet i was all alone. People came by, went by. They sure got added to my Facebook account, but never to my friend account. I was fed up. I was fed up of the fact that despite having a thousand friends, i never could really make one. A real friend. Nobody to share stuff with. Not that it bothered me. Just that I couldn’t stomach the fact of 1000:(is to) 0. I was always looking for 1. Just 1, because I’m not greedy in this area. And thus, i ended my journey on Facebook by not giving a shit about it, about the number 1000.
Hence, I said HII to instagram. Making sure i didn’t make a bubble again, i kept it low key. People whined “you joined insta? never told us. You don’t even follow back”. Frankly, not even my little finger cared about it, because i had my reasons. Even today people have estranged me for the fact that I’m too snobbish and selfish to follow them. But, all I’ve been trying to do on instagram is NOT MAKE THE F*******BUBBLE AGAIN. NEVERTHELESS, it happened. I was forced into the system of life and i ended up viewing posts of people I really didn’t give a damn about.
Next came Whatsapp. Yes! Never before had i used Whatsapp. I was a newbie. Aim was to make the smallest bubble. Luckily, it materialized. Why? Because dot com friends don’t have your number so they’re ruled out of Whatsapp. Just as i rejoiced, my contact spread and people reached out and scenes became just the same.
I have no problem with friends at all. You contact me, reach me, all great. I’ll be glad. But the fact that, i was in a quest to find myself a mate, kept me unsatisfied throughout.
Long story short, eventually i did make real friends undoubtedly. And now i know they are real because they are just tooooo unmatching to dot com peeps. Had i never realized that i was missing out on something in life, i would’ve never been able to reach closure. Had i not seen the bubble, had i just transformed as over friendly, extrovert, to make friends, i would’ve exacerbated my own predicament. Had i been complacent about having those 1000 friends and living happily thereafter, oh dear, i know not what i would’ve not known.
So, My dear friends, my uttermost concern is that EVEN YOU REALIZE THAT BUBBLE. THAT VIRTUAL BUBBLE YOU’RE LIVING IN, FUELING EVERYDAY. Confine it to manageable sizes. Know what you care about and whom. Don’t get carried away by numbers, they’re disastrously misleading. Have dot com friends. But relegate them to the ON GRID CATEGORY AND SET REAL FRIENDS ON THE OFF GRID ONE. BECAUSE, I TELL YOU, THIS WORD FRIEND, IS A VERY AMBIGUOUS AND RELATIVE TERM. You need to train your brain to expect what from what type of friend.
That’s how you achieve enlightenment in 2k17, no?
Thanks for hearing me out.